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Way Out​/​Some Doubts

by The Sun Band

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1.
There was a time when I kept the fire secret Yearning and burning, tried to smother the flame But all the sad devices that are given to deceive us Don’t count for nothing when exposed to the pain There was a time when I struggled just to see it Searching outside me for somebody to blame But I’ve always been my only judge, jury, and deceiver At last the cleaver has severed my chains I can see you covering yourself Burying your precious love I believe you’ll resurrect yourself Sooner or later, you’ll come But while you don’t I gotta… Killed an hour waiting here You wafted in on gentle air Oh, I long to be there when The spark inside you invites me in ‘Cause each day We once again must face The rushing river we can’t escape I see your eyes but I can’t relate Sometimes I catch myself believing that I know it But what I think I know just cannot be known I cannot hold truth inside my modest whirring thought box I can’t fence in the river onto which I’m thrown I can see you loving life itself Seeing each day as it comes But I too have no control over myself Maybe I’ll see you I won’t But till we know we gotta…
2.
Way Out 02:49
I am not cured I am not cured I can say I am not cured I can say But I am happy here today I'm insecure I'm insecure I'm afraid I'm insecure I'm afraid But I am working to clear this pain I am looking for a way out Will I always have some doubts? Will I always have some doubts? Will I always have some doubts? These feelings for Reasons that cannot explain I'm ever your companion That is all I can say Pray to God to clear my mind out Will I always have some doubts? Will I always have some doubts? Will I always have some doubts? Last night I went downstairs And saw something that's always there Last night I went outside and saw something that never dies Last night I saw myself In the middle of a human house Last night I left my skin And saw things how they've always been How they've always been How they've always been Still I cry and scream and shout Will I always have some doubts? Will I always have some doubts? Will I always have some doubts? I am looking for a way out Will I always have some doubts? Will I always have some doubts? Will I always have some doubts?
3.
I could not live here without you I would be dead I would be I could not have peace without you I would be dead I would be I have problems like fear and worry like am I good? like who would love me? when I get sad like I could not live here without you I would be dead I would be I could not have peace without you I would be dead I would be I've gone crazy I've gone sane nothing left of my one time game God can take these ills (x4) God can take these ills (x7) God can take these ills (x4)
4.
Interlude 1 00:50
5.
Never Seen 03:59
You were underneath the water You were hiding up a tree You seemed inclined to fortify this awful secrecy I caught a glimmer So let down your guard One afternoon I'll be consumed by everything you are You're not someone else You're not someone else Outline in the current Squint too hard to see One afternoon I'll be consumed By everything I need I want to be quiet I want to be still I want to want nothing I hope someday I will Love is all I need Love is all I need I wake up in your bed every morning You appear in my heart without warning In this place I recognize Try to see what underlies Love is all I need Love is all I need
6.
Oughtta 03:46
You oughtta know that your love is divine soul complete and you're right on time 'cause your heart is just like mine: a ripple worried, well the ripple's fine well the ripple's fine You oughtta know that the sumimt's far but the road's right here right where we are so get on the road in your own way see this prison as an open cage as an open cage I wake up in a haze every day, every day till I set myself free I wake up every night and take a peek at the light that you left there for me that you left there for me that you left there for me You know I feel oh, so confused I get worried I miss the clues You know I feel like I been called I am fearless for love is all for love is all I wake up in a haze every day, every day till I set myself free I wake up every night and take a peek at the light that you left there for me that you left there for me that you left there for me that you left there for me You oughtta know
7.
Interlude 2 00:22
8.
Are you near? Are you getting near? Are you getting so you cannot leave now? Are you lost? Are you getting lost? Are you getting so you can not be found? Are you high? Are you getting high? Are you getting so you cannot come down? Will you stay 'round? Are you gone? Are you really gone? Are you really where you should not be now? Are you wild? Are you getting wild? Are you getting so you cannot be thought? Are you sick? Are you getting sick? Are you lying, dying, or confused now? Do you know how?
9.
Hey Lolly 03:46
Who holds the key to the final door? Hey lolly don’t you know? Got a big old bag full of purses Hey lolly don’t you know? I asked for less, but you gave me more Hey lolly don’t you know? I’ll keep on bowing till I pass the floor Hey lolly don’t you know? In springtime, we pass away We are born astride our dying day Intwined with the light of day Is sea foam and the astral plane Are you looking for me? Down in the dirt with the worms and roaches Hey lolly, move away I can’t tell the priests from the poachers Hey lolly move away I’d die to know when the way is pure Hey lolly right away I would not feel so insecure Hey lolly right away The freedom behind our skin Is the only world I’m living in Free form - is it underpinned? I want more than I’m putting in Are you running thin, please Be my teacher, be my guide Be the sweet truth come alive Be the blood upon my door Be my lover, be my son Be the fabric come undone There’s a light on in my room The freedom behind our skin Is the only world I’m living in Free form: is it underpinned? I want more than I’m putting in Are you running thin, please?
10.
Interlude 3 00:44
11.
Always 02:29
There is but one way Peace in all your days I wish that I could hold your light And keep it lit in the darkest night The radiation warms my skin And when I’m clear I let you in You could never me betray Your love is clearer than the light of day Always There is no escape Except to escape I’m grateful for the love you give Which gives my spirit cause to live You are tender-hearted too I know because I am you I know no fear that you can’t crack Trapped together I’ll watch your back Always.
12.
You look to the dawning to quiet the dark You got ten metal fingers; they whistle and spark And if time’s an illusion, then now’s not the start of an awe evoking symphony You trade paper for paper, though thoughts never stray towards the organ-evangelist tent-promenade nor the stoic abandoning thought-masquerade no pleasure in your epiphanies I’m asking a question of opulent wealth while flavors of fingertips stick to my mouth Remember the time when we all drove down south, and you found, then lost, that melody? There will be a day When we will find our clarity Pine for all your life Submit, submit to mystery The air we breath is stained With long-forgotten litanies Spare them, gentle void Spare us, or our effigies You whisper the lyrics some other soul saved from oblivion, solitude kept on the page recorded and sent out in elegant waves don’t worry, it’s just a memory Where is there a choice? I will take infinity Can I hear a voice not some cheap facsimile? Silent like a child Still and wild energy Stones after awhile Disappearing entropy
13.
The Sun Song 00:54
I hope that the sun is in love with the way we curl to our sides and break peace with the night I hear that the sun has a thought it won’t say Regarding the time it will take to unwind I hope that the sun will stay locked in its place Until it decides That it’s pro- bably safe
14.
Walter 02:03
O Christ of Mystery's fellows Can you hear my longing bellows? Can you feel my yearning call To be reunited once and for all? O mystics of days gone by it is to you I cry as it is to the moss on the lawn as it is for perpetual dawn Only but for knowledge of you I would be angry too I would be a selfish man But o lord, I do what I can Your sweet music is all I demand In your presence I am less than a man and I feel your love O substance beyond perception You want only reception with quiet mind and empty self Childhood of boundless wealth Aura of my dearest love What are you made of? What is your atomic weight? What lies beyond this gate? Time is dimensional too Have you reckoned truth? Fold through all you like. Our lord knows no strife his lord is timeless life his lord is of the ineffable type To be sought by all.

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released February 17, 2016

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The Sun Band New Haven, Connecticut

The Sun Band is Mike Cotter, Michael Norton, Grant Jones, and Grace Mendel. Album art by Alice McDonald Games.

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